Felix the Vietnamese Water Cobra

was introduced to the Omega campus after my father and I made a fruitful visit to the toy store on my time off. I returned to Rhinebeck with exploding pens, a rubber pencil, whoopee cushions, a fart whistle, plastic cowboys and Indians, a parachuting soldier, and last but not least, a 10 inch rubber snake that was advertised to grow to up to four times its size once you put it in water.

I left him marinating in a huge food bin on top of the refrigerator in the staff dining hall. His head bobbed against the plastic overlooking a taped up sign that read "Hi! My name is Felix!" Underneath, I slapped on a piece of tape that had been on the counter, with the ingredients for lemon scones; "eggs, lemon, flour, butter, sugar." I easily convinced a few idiots that that was the recipe I had used to craft him in the art hut. ("But he looks so rubbery!" Some protested). 

Soon I added an addendum that said, "Please don't feed me." But after a few days, during which he continued to grow larger and larger, I decided he still wasn't getting enough attention. With the help of some other trickster-y staff members, we crafted some new, larger signs that warned, "Vietnamese River Cobra. Don't Pet: He Bites." Now Felix was really looming large.