Overheard in my Head

I'm going to be adding two new sections to my blog. One is called, "Overheard in my Head," and the other is called, "Overheard in the Tenderloin." The idea for "Overheard in my Head" took place when I was traveling alone through Europe and my mind would sometimes make really ridiculous wisecracks, or I would have moments of funny dialogue with myself, and even develop inside jokes with myself which was rather tragic, but entertaining nonetheless. Here are some snippets to get us all caught up:

In Rome, walking the streets:

Mind #1: (taking in the obese American tourists with their fanny packs and baseball hats and unflattering khakis) Ugh, these people. They look horrible!

Mind #2: (taking in the black scuffed cowboy boots and baggy brown maternity pants bought rather accidentally at an Italian market, and the purple short sleeved shirt and strands of humidity frazzled hair) Have you seen yourself lately? HAVE YOU?!

In Greece, perched on a rock facing the ocean after taking steep stairs down to sea level:

Mind #1: (rather panicked) But what if a tsunami comes?!

Mind #2: (unflappably Zen) If a tsunami comes, I'll just get out of the way.

At home, almost giving up on cooking because I couldn't reach the box of couscous stored high up on the Lazy Susan:

Mind: Really?!

And today, about to clean but not being able to figure out the vacuum and almost giving up:

Mind #1: Oh come on, Liz. Just be as smart as the vacuum. Maybe you can't be smarter, but you can at least be as smart.